Shat
terd
Men
The hidden half of domestic violence
HAPPINESS
Michael
is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has
something positive to say:
When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would reply, "If I were any
better, I would be twins!"
He was a natural motivator. If an employee was having a bad day, Michael was
there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation.
Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up to Michael and
asked him, "I don't get it! You can't be a positive person all of the time.
How do you do it?" Michael replied, "Each morning I wake up and say to
myself, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or you
can choose to be in a bad mood. I choose to be in a good mood.
Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or I can choose to
learn from it. I choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me
complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or I can point out the
positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life.
"Yeah, right, it's not that easy," I protested. "Yes, it is"
Michael said. "Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk,
every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose
how people affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood.
The bottom line: It's your choice how you live life." I reflected on what
Michael said. Soon thereafter, I left the company to start my own business. We
lost touch, but I often thought about him when I made a choice about life
instead of reacting to it. Several years later, I heard that Michael was
involved in a serious accident, falling some 60 feet from a communications
tower.
After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, Michael was released from
the hospital with rods placed in his back. I saw Michael about six months after
the accident. When I asked him how he was, he replied. "If I were any
better, I'd be twins.
Wanna see my scars?" I declined to see his wounds, but I did ask him what
had gone through his mind as the accident took place. "The first thing that
went through my mind was the well-being of my soon to be born daughter, "
Michael replied. "Then, as I lay on the ground, I remembered that I had two
choices: I could choose to live or I could choose to die. I chose to live."
"Weren't you scared? Did you lose consciousness?" I asked. Michael
continued, "...the paramedics were great. They kept telling
me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the ER and I saw the
expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In
their eyes, I read "he's a dead man. I knew I needed to take action."
"What did you do?" I asked. "Well, there was a big burly nurse
shouting questions at me," said Michael. "She asked if I was allergic
to anything. "Yes, I replied." The doctors and nurses stopped working
as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breath and yelled, Gravity."
Over their laughter, I told them, "I am choosing to live. Operate on me as
if I am alive, not dead." Michael lived, thanks to the skill of his
doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude. I learned from him that every
day we have the choice to live fully. Attitude, after all, is everything.
"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about
itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." After all today is the
tomorrow you worried about yesterday.
(from e-mail author unknown)
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JUNE is Domestic Violence Against Men Awareness Month